I Still Believe in Miracles

 

I can't help but be in complete awe watching our embryos.  Just a glimpse of life as it begins... and in our case, ends.

Twelve beautiful chances at life... twelve reasons to be thankful... twelve potential lives, some gone within hours.

What you're looking at is our Embryoscope.  Something our clinic, MCRM (Missouri Center for Reproductive Medicine) offers for an additional cost to their patients.

Our embryos never left the incubator.  You're seeing a time-lapsed video of the many photos they were able to take of our beautiful babies from the point of fertilization all the way to Day 5.

I am so grateful we chose to do the Embryoscope program.  I would recommend this program to anyone going through IVF, however, it's not a program many clinics offer.

Why did we chose to do Embryoscope? 

1.  We wanted to see our babies.  Our first cycle, we never saw a picture.  I think this made it harder to grieve when the cycle failed.

2.  We knew a failed cycle was a possibility.  We thought the Embryoscope program would allow us to have a better idea (well, the doctors) should things go wrong, where they went wrong.

3.  If it succeeded, we thought it would be an amazing piece of their life to have.  IVF is a part of the baby's journey.  Part of our journey.  To have it captured in this way... incredible isn't a strong enough word.

4.  It's safer for the embryos.  Without this program, they would need to be taken out of the incubator at certain points to monitor growth.  While the environment is sterile and safe, any extra precautions we could take were going to.

I feel a sense of closure I don't think I would have had if we hadn't done this program.  Life is precious and beautiful.  This video proves it.  

 

I wish I had more poignant things to say this evening, but I don't.  All I have are these videos.  I pride myself on speaking from the heart, and lately my heart feels pretty plugged up.  So I'm not going to sit here and pretend I have something earth-shatteringly beautiful to say when I don't.

I just wanted to share our babies with you.  Call me crazy for calling them our babies, that's ok.  But, they are our babies and always will be.

Here's a look at the three that made it the furthest.  It's still crazy to me that we are able to see this - literally life beginning before our eyes. 

I still believe miracles happen.  Ours is just still in the making.

Love,

Kristy