Awhile back I saw an article aimed at "pet parents". Apparently, some parents of humans, or "human parents" are offended/taken aback when us "pet parents" do silly things like celebrate Mother's Day.
Now, don't get me wrong - this article made some VERY valid points, and I can see where the author was coming from. But can I level with you here??? Are people SERIOUSLY so... LITERAL and upset by this?
Please know this is written with nothing but love. I'm not angry. Appalled, maybe. But not angry. Hear me out.
1. We KNOW we aren't "parents" (in the conventional sense). Obviously I didn't carry around my cat/dog/rabbit in my belly for 9 months. My blood and body did not nourish these tiny beings. I did not experience morning sickness, swollen ankles, gestational diabetes, bedrest, or labor. No, my pets - or "children" - came to me as youngsters. I can thank the two dogs, two bunnies, and two sets of cats for going through the tough part of giving birth to their respective litters. I'm not delusional. Obviously you giving birth to your 6 pound, 8 ounce bundle of joy was a much tougher task than adopting my pets. And before you jump down my throat about comparing adopting children to adopting pets... you know what? Let's not even go there because - well, see my previous statement. For some of us, these animals ARE our children because we (a) are having trouble conceiving on our own or (b) choose to live a human child-free life.
2. No, we aren't kept up all night by a newborn. BUT - sometimes the kitten decides to pee on the bed, the dog decides to vomit on the carpet, the rabbit chooses this moment to bang around in her cage, presumably attempting to escape. So, don't you go thinking we get a full night of beauty rest EVERY night. I've lost count of the number of times we have had to strip down our bed and take it to the washing machine because our kitten had a UTI.
3. No, we don't have to change dirty diapers. But - see point two. I've had to change my bed sheets. Not only that, I have to make sure I'm home by certain times to let out the dog. I have to clean out litter boxes and rabbit bedding. I have to carry around a baggy when the dog goes for walks. Do you see where I'm going here? And here's the kicker, folks. THEY DON'T OUTGROW THIS! Similar to you (but, not EXACTLY like, because if I were to say that, someone would get their parent panties in a bunch), I have to clean the waste my "children" deposit. And I will for the rest of their lives. Heck, when they're old enough, I'm sure I'll be cleaning pee and poop off of my nice area rugs and hardwood floors. Oh, and we potty train here, too. Except... you know... eventually your little bundle of joy will learn how to use a toilet and clean up after his or her self. I don't have that luxury. I also don't care, because let's face it, I love these four-legged weirdos.
4. No, we don't deal with back talk like you do. We do, however, deal with behavior issues like leg humping, digging in the yard, ignoring our calls, eating clothes or cords, territory marking, furniture scratching, arm/leg/face scratching, begging, etc. But I know - that's not the same and you, in all reality, have it worse. I won't have to deal with any teen angst from any of my pets/pet children.
5. No, we... wait, yes we do. Guess what? MY PETS GO TO THE VETERINARIAN! Look up veterinarian. I betcha it says something along the lines of "pet doctor". You take yours to the doctor for routine shots and exams? So do we! Did we just become best friends?!? Sure, my bills may be less expensive. But it all depends on the baby/tiny human/growing human and the pet. Some pets have conditions for which they need upkeep. I just spent more than $300 on my kitten who is likely prone to UTI's and will need special food. But I, like you, love my baby as much as you love yours, so I'll do what I have to for her. I also once spent more than $100 on my pet mouse that cost me $5 at the pet store. Why? Because OUR PETS ARE OUR FAMILY! If you're really concerned about comparing medical bills, don't get me wrong - you win.
6. No, we don't have to educate our pets like you have to with your children. But some people choose to put their pooches through obedience training. Don't get me wrong, as much as I'd like to teach my dog Spanish, my cats how to multiply and divide, and my rabbit the colors of the rainbow, I can't. Does this bother me? Not really. But part of me wishes I could because I like to teach and last time I checked, TEACHING YOUR CHILDREN IS PART OF BEING A PARENT. It's not something us pet parents signed up for.
7. No, pets aren't as expensive as children. Duh. We know you spend way more taking care of your babies than we do caring for our pets. But we do have to buy food, medicines as necessary, toys, treats, and other things to keep fido, kitten mittens, and bunny butts healthy and happy.
Bottom line - we KNOW pet parenting is NOT the same as human parenting. None of us are that stupid. But, to our credit, we - like you - WOULD GO TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH AND BACK to care for our pets.
I wish I had the luxury of having a tiny human to care for. But I don't. Instead I have four animals, all of which have ridiculously long names. I talk to them. I hold them. I pet them, feed them, take them to the vet. Sure, compared to parenting in "real life" it may seem like nothing. But for me it's all I have - and for others, it's all they have and/or all they want. (Disclaimer - I have a beautiful, wonderful bonus daughter I get to help raise, and I know I'm an important part of her life/upbringing - but that's an entirely different post).
So PLEASE... just let Pet Parents be Pet Parents. Let us celebrate the fun of Mother's Day and Father's Day. We care for and love our pets like they were our children and for people like me wish desperately the celebration was with our own babies we got to hold in our arms. I would LOVE a hand-drawn card from a child who looks like his/her daddy and me. I would trade nearly anything in this world for that experience. But for now, I'm grateful for what I do have - and for me it's my husband, bonus daughter, and my fur babies - King Louie Mallowmar Yodle Whitman, III, Boggle Macaroni Nahdle Whitman, PhD; Duchess Kira Macadamia Bliss Whitman, and Countess Willow Irene Nutella-Waffle Whitman.
From pet mom to pet mom or pet mom to human mom, keep on rocking what you're doing.
Love,
Kristy
